Burlesque?…Oh Boy! (Not All Bad)

I’m really surprised I actually ended up going to see Burlesque.  It’s not really the type of movie that goes over well in my household, which consists of me and my parents.  However, I declared in a tweet last Sunday night I wanted to see Burlesque but I would probably end up going alone.  I know, whaa-whaa! Woe is me!  And honestly, I would’ve gone by myself to see it; if I’m hell-bent to see something I’ll go alone.  Nonetheless, I found someone who would go and I ended up seeing a few other friends there, so this was good times! 
The plot is very simple, Christina Aguilera plays Ali, a girl in Iowa who gets fed up with her dead end job and she decides singing and dancing in LA is where it’s at.  We see several montages, the first one being where Ali is going through ads in the paper for “singers/dancer/etc”, then all of a sudden she sees the Burlesque Lounge as if it’s an oasis in the desert.  She’s instantly taken with the show, who wouldn’t?  Alan Cumming appears as the doorman and I’m mad he didn’t get more screen time.  She encounters a bartender, Jack, played by one of the bazillion Twilight darlings, Cam Gigandet.  The other main star is someone you may have heard of, CHER! who plays the Burlesque Lounge’s nervous, yet talented owner, Tess.  Ali tries to ask for a job and Tess naturally shoots her down and she tells her to come back and audition another time.  Stanley Tucci did a better job as a gay design assistant in The Devil Wears Prada, but he’s mildly enjoyable as Tess’ gay show/seamstress/assistant Sean in Burlesque.  Other minor characters, Kristen Bell as the “always late for the show/alcoholic” Nikki, Eric “McSteamy” Dane as Marcus, who wants to buy the club and Tess always says no, even though her establishment, wait for it…is in financial trouble.  Eventually, Ali proves herself to Tess, as someone to replace trainwreck Nikki, however, the Burlesque performers only dance, they don’t sing until a jealous Nikki pulls the plug on one of Ali’s performances, she doesn’t know what to do, but what else? Sing!  Tess realizes Ali is great and she decides to re-design the entire show around Ali’s powerhouse voice.  So after many montages of Ali’s rise to the top, Jack seduces her even though he has a fiancee’ played by Glee’s Diana Agron, Ali comes up with a scheme so Tess can keep her club.  AIR RATES!  I had never heard of people owning air above buildings until this evening.  Thus, everyone is happy at the end and so ends the torture of Burlesque.  But let me indulge in a little Cher…here’s her solo from the movie, “You Haven’t Seen The Last of Me” written by Grammy winner Diane Warren…best part of the film!

If You Happen to Google Kim…

The stories you’ll see are that Ms. Zolciak is in fact pregnant!  A fact she denied on Watch What Happens Live! last night on Bravo; well I don’t know if the clip made the broadcast, but you can find it in the bonus clips. Zolciak has been dating Atlanta Falcons’ star Kroy Biermann since May.  You saw them meet in the infamous, “Sheree dances” episode just last week.  I missed my favorite Housewives last night, due to way too many shows I keep up with: the American Music Awards–NKOTBSB!, Boardwalk Empire–dirty and naughty last night!, and The Walking Dead–what happened to the dude who sawed his hand off???  So I also missed the after show.  I’ll get to my DVR as soon as I can.  Oh and how can I forget, Adam Lambert’s E! True Hollywood Story debuted last night as well; I did watch it before I went to bed.  Um, I didn’t learn anything I didn’t already know.  The only new information I got was the Parents Televsion Council’s complaint about Glambert’s racy performance at the American Music Awards LAST year is still in the process of being heard by the FCC–really?  And his simple battery case against a papparazo a few months ago in Miami is still pending.  The show as a whole was okay; and yes, the AMAs were controversy-free this time around; oh how could you ABC? 
Okay, well here’s Kim performing her new hit single (?) “Google Me” on Watch What Happens Live:

Gemini’s Twin…Never Forget…

Yes, Gwyneth Paltrow has been EVERYWHERE lately!  Last night’s GLEE was superb, and I bet we see her again, since Mr. Schu asked her to substitute if he ever gets sick again…hooray!  She made her country music debut last Wednesday in Nashville at the CMA awards; it was truly one of the better performances of the night and she got a standing ovation…duh!  I really want to see Country Strong; it has the look and the attitude of a little movie you might remember, The Thing Called Love…
Anyway, whenever Paltrow graces the stage at SNL, she shines like no one else.  Hell, she may be the best guest host of the last 25 years, well, except Betty White.  One of Paltrow’s best moments on SNL was her stint in Gemini’s Twin…many third members came and went, but Chanterelle schooled them all…watch and never forget:

Zombies Are Cool! (Non-Gay Post)

I love zombies!  I’ve always been a fan of the original Night of the Living Dead series, especially the original Dawn of the Dead which stars a bunch of no-name actors escaping zombies whilst holed up in a mall, classic.  The new AMC hit series The Walking Dead is basically the same, no-name actors, with the exception of Michael Rooker–and he’s only appeared in small doses so far, they are holed up in Atlanta in a department store, again, only briefly.  In short, I love this show!  I guess the blood and guts appeal to me, I love horror movies and I love the tension and high drama.  Sure, the same zombie problems exist.
1. Zombies, for some reason, can’t climb…although this theory has been put to the test with the third episode…I’ll leave you hanging, since I don’t want to be blamed for any spoilers! 
2. Zombies now don’t die automatically…yes, the head shot, either by bullet or by axe still works but The Walking Dead shows a torso-only zombie crawling around in the first episode, and she’s still hungry!  It’s the first time I’ve seen half a zombie still roaming around in any film or tv show, brilliant.
3. Zombies will eat ANYTHING…again, spoilers…animals…ewwww!
I would describe the series as The Stand meets Planet Terror with a dash of the original Dawn of the Dead thrown in.  It’s based on a graphic comic series by Robert Kirkman; and this graphic comic works, some don’t.  I’m just saying Watchmen, the movie, was terrible!  The Walking Dead is executive produced by Academy Award nominee, Frank Darabont (The Shawshank Redemption, The Green Mile).  I think it’s interesting the main character, Sheriff Rick Grimes, hails from Kentucky in the comic.  And the series was shot in Atlanta, the production design is very well executed. 
Sadly, there are only 3 episodes left in the first season.  There are 13 volumes of the comic, so a second season is on tap, maybe a third, if the material can be stretched.  And who knows, Kirkman may write more material since the reception and the reviews for the series have been positive so far. 
So, if you want to check out The Walking Dead, you can see the pilot episode at AMC’s website, if not, I believe AMC reruns the last few episodes before the new one airs at 9pm central…
*I realize this blog isn’t my normal fare, but I assure you, I will continue to sound off about all things gay in pop culture, I was just so excited about this show, that’s all.*