Bath Salts, Dingoes, And Charlize Theron, Oh My!

Confession time! I have an extremely obsessive personality. It’s not so much that a current buzz word like “bath salts” or “face-eating” makes me go nuts, I want to know more, which I think is natural.

THE CANADIAN PRESS/Adrian Wyld

Up until yesterday, I had no idea what these bath salt drugs looked like. The image above is just one example. These drugs are marketing with druggy names like, “Ivory Wave”, “Vanilla Sky” (EEEK!), “Bliss”, and many, many more. I think “Kamikaze Krack” or “Flesh” may have been more appropriate. Indiana is the first state I’ve read about that is starting to bust bath salt vendors. And of course, gas stations are the main offenders. Pretty soon, all those shiny, glossy-looking energy drinks will be banned. I’ve never tasted one and I don’t plan to. This is as wild as I get.

Juggalo Juice bitches! (mi-madeproducts.com)

I’ve also read, bath salts can also be referred to as “bath powder”, now that makes more sense. As for Ronald Poppo, victim of the Miami face eating, he’s doing well and he’s a Heat fan! Duh! I wonder what epsom salts taste like? Hoard them now!

As it turns out, a dingo did kill Lindy Chamberlain’s (now Chamberlain-Creighton) baby daughter Azaria in 1980. The Australian incident was famously dramatized in the 1988 film, A Cry in the Dark for which Meryl Streep received her seventh Oscar nomination as Chamberlain. Yes, “a dingo took my baby” or “a dingo ate my baby” became catchphrases soon after.

“Say what now?”

Though Chamberlain was sentenced to life in prison for her daughter’s murder, in 1988, all charges were dropped and she was compensated for wrongful imprisonment. It’s odd after all these years, the most obvious conclusion was finally recognized. I say a documentary is in the works, please! Because I LOVE documentaries and if they can get Streep to throw in her two cents, that would make it even better. A dingo took my…never mind.

jingdianmeinv/Flickr

Okay, so why am I lumping in Charlize Theron with this stream of consciousness? She’s a hot commodity right now! She’s in Snow White and the Huntsman (it’s good!) and Prometheus (I haven’t seen it yet, but it’s getting mixed reviews), so she’s making the press junket rounds. Plus, last night I watched Young Adult, which was dark, but it came off as more sad/funny. Theron plays Mavis Gary, who ghost writes a series of “young adult” books called Waverly Prep and after seeing a photo of her old high school boyfriend’s new baby in an email, she decides to make a trip home in an effort to try and win him back. Theron is great of course, but the other bright spot is comedian Patton Oswalt as another classmate, Matt Freehauf, who was beaten so badly in high school, he has to use a crutch for the rest of his life. It’s got a lot of 90’s nostalgia references and music, and it’s written by Diablo Cody, how can you lose?

 

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