Some Alternate Titles For Flo Rida’s “Whistle”

I think I’ve written several times I work part-time in radio. So I’m used to hearing all kinds of music and listening for what the competition is up to. Though I don’t work at a pop or CHR station (Contemporary Hit Radio), I still generally like to listen to pop music. However, some of the songs out there right now are either really, really good or really, really suggestive. Here’s how radio has changed in the last decade. I interned at a pop station and I sat in with the midday DJ, one day a caller requested “Men in Black” by Will Smith and the DJ told the caller the song couldn’t be played until after 7pm. This was in the summer of 1999, yep, standards have evolved big time. If you turn on a morning show now, you will hear everything, rap, hip-hop, rock, dance, and this goes on all day. In honesty, it’s a good thing because one listener may like dance, but then the next listener may like a pop ballad or a rock or a country song that has broken the format barrier.

What’s not a good thing is just how nasty a song can get. This weekend, me and friend were driving around and we heard this song with the lines, “you can blow my whistle baby, whistle baby…” HUH!?! I read one article that said “Whistle” by Flo Rida is maybe the least subtle pop song ever made. Um, yes. Ironically, my friend, who travels around the country for work, said she encountered the Oscar Meyer Weinermobile one day and she was asked if she wanted a weenie whistle.

WEENIES! (Flickr/Pirate Alice)

Funny story, but back to Flo Rida. I think the reason it’s going to be a big hit is because it’s catchy and it has whistling in it, you know, the regular kind? I got to thinking of some other titles that might be a little less subtle.

-Skin Flute (eww!)

-Weiner (see above)

-Penis (a given)

-Johnson (not as enticing)

-Weenus (a little twist)

-Pecker (evil!)

-One-Eyed Snake (too long, pun!)

-Test Tube (Scientific!)

-Schlong (Too short, but at an -er on the end)

-Ding-A-Ling (Oops, too late!, the other song that wasn’t subtle)

-Cobra (For the Stallone and/or G.I. Joe fans)

See? The possibilities are endless. NASTY! Here, substitute one of these terms in place of whistle, have fun!

 

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